by Wendy Fortna
As a new Mom, I have experienced that “How is mom doing?” is a question that is rarely asked. Being a new Mom, with a newborn, is the hardest things I have had to do. It outweighs moving away from home, pulling all nighters for my MBA, and balancing a fulltime job with numerous volunteering commitments! I realize that everyone is so excited for the safe and healthy arrival of the new baby and wants to be introduced to them ASAP.
Although this is seen as a joyous occasion for new parents and family – and do not get me wrong it is but, it also brings a lot of challenges. I was going through physical and emotional changes all while having to deal with this new role that nothing can prepare you for! My biggest challenge was that I felt I was alone in this. I thought I was supposed to be happy and just totally in love in my newborn when the actual truth was, I was just trying to find some time to eat between the baby’s feedings, changes, and constant need for attention. People would ask “How is the baby?” and wanted to see pictures. I found myself thinking “Well - what about me?” I am still a human being going through a lot of change including adjusting to my new role of Mother.
Now, I want to make it clear that I did have a lot of support from my husband, family, and friends. It was at this time that I grew closer to a small group of friends who had new babies as well and could relate. They asked, “How are you doing?” and with those simple words I knew I was not alone. They gave me tips and tricks without any judgement. I do not know what I would have done without them.
So, for all the Moms out there remember you are not alone! PLEASE do not be scared to admit that being a Mom is HARD. It’s not always sunshine and rainbows no matter how many pictures you see on social media of people who make it look easy. Remember at the end of the day we are all just trying our best to do what we can do with the means that we have. It’s OK to admit that being a Mom is not what you thought it would be and that you need support!
Please remember the next time a new baby enters the world ask Mom “How are you doing?” and, if she says “fine” please just bring her a casserole because TRUST ME the food is always appreciated!